Wednesday Wrath: HFCS Commercials (Subtitle: Do They Think We're Stupid?)

I know I'm a little late to the party on this one, but let's break it down, shall we?

It's made from corn - this is actually true! It is made from corn! But it's processed through a bunch of scientific methods, which I will not bore you with, but, sufficed to say it uses lots of energy and creates lots of waste. Also, just because something is MADE from corn, doesn't mean it's good for you, right? I mean, look at cornbread - it's delicious, but not exactly healthy. Creamed corn? Polenta (made with butter and Parmesan cheese, of course)? Not so much. Why is the fact that it's made from corn a selling point, exactly?

Regardless, growing the corn in the first place isn't that great, anyway. I mean, the government basically pays farmers to grow corn to make ethanol, HFCS, and cow feed, instead of encouraging them to grow a variety of crops to encourage and ensure a healthy population with a highly varied diet of fruits and vegetables. Then, the farmers are forced to pesticide and fertilize the crap out of the corn crop to ensure they produce enough to make a good amount of money, which I don't need to tell you completely destroys the soil, the ecosystem, and pretty much the entire environment. All so we can make Twinkies, ice pops, and fruit drink - all stuff no one should ever eat, anyway.

It's fine in moderation - OK, also true, but isn't everything fine in moderation? I mean, if I do crack once or twice in my life, will that adversely affect me? Probably not. If I eat a delicious roasted chicken, slathered in gravy with mashed potatoes once a month, will I die of a heart attack? Most likely, no. But, my point here is that it's almost impossible to eat processed food and have HFCS in moderation. It's in EVERYTHING. Look at the loaf of bread on your counter or in the fridge. What about your cereal in the morning? Your soup at lunch? Your frozen Lean Cuisine dinner? Your salad dressing? The list goes on and on. Sure, having one Ho-ho is fine, but add that to your breakfast of Lucky Charms, the sandwich and soup you had for lunch, the soda you had driving home, etc., and you're pretty much screwed. It's become so ubiquitous in the American diet that we don't even notice it.

If we all want to stop getting diabetes, heart disease, and getting fat, we need to really look at the ingredients of the foods we eat. Better yet, eat foods that have no "ingredients" by buying some chicken, vegetables, and rice and making dinner yourself. It saves you money, keeps you healthy, and gives you delicious leftovers to bring to work the next day - making your co-workers jealous. Plus, it makes me rant less, which keeps my blood pressure down, which results in happier Iko and happier people around her.

So, to sum up: WTF!!? HFCS ads? Don't pretend we're stupid. And don't make me cut you.

And Now, The Bastard Offspring of The Tuesday Tirade - The Wednesday Wrath

Shockingly, not too much pissed me off yesterday. I was mostly tired, which led to my general apathy toward the degeneracy surrounding me. However, today, I'm back in fighting form, so I present to you The Wednesday Wrath:

The Asshole Who Sits Next to Me in Stats.

I'm taking a one-credit statistics class as my last class ever for graduate school. I only need one more credit, so F-ed if I'm going to take a full semester, three-credit one. It's a five week class, during which our TA teaches us how to use SAS to run statistical analysis. Not hard (TWSS). Especially since I already have a working knowledge of SAS, but just wanted to learn the shortcuts and some of the more, shall we say, intimate details of the program. One credit, five weeks, I figured I'd power through and be done. And, it's fine, except that it's an undergraduate class and I'd forgotten how bitchy and annoying those little, privileged weasels are...GOD.

The class is one night a week, for 2 hours and 50 minutes. And, you know what? The class is kind of annoying, I'm not going to lie. It's in a classroom in one of the many computer labs on campus, since we're using a statistical program and there's only one TA who has to walk around and check everyone's programs and answer everyone's questions before we move on. It sucks. It takes 45 minutes to get through one procedure in SAS, because pretty much everyone has questions (mostly regarding missing semi colons) and the TA, quite frankly, isn't very good at explaining anything. But, it's a one-credit class for God's Sake. Just F-ing sit there, check your fantasy baseball team or favorite blogs (AbS) in the downtime and suck it up. Am I right?

But, ADD boy next to me can't hold it together. He NEVER runs the programs the TA asks him to. He just sits there and texts or IMs his friends and sighs loudly in my ear, in a disgruntled fashion. Half the time, he doesn't even have SAS open on his computer, it's literally just on the screen saver. Then, when the TA comes by to check his work, he says, "Oh, sorry, I didn't get it," but never looks up from his stupid iPhone. And, to make matters worse, the TA doesn't care, and the asshole will probably pass the class, since the TA doesn't know anyone's name anyway.

Seriously, you know what? I get that it's a state school. I get that spoiled, rich brats get bribed by their parents to come here with a shiny, new BMW or Lexus. I get that these kids don't have to pay for school, work jobs while they're in school, or even pay loans once they leave. I'm OK with that, their parents worked hard so their children don't need to leave school in debt. Fine. This isn't me, bitterly ranting about my school debt or my parents' lack of planning. But, W. T. FFFFFFFFFFF. Don't F-ing piss me off, asshole in stats. I'm paying for my undergraduate loans (still) and working at said state school full time so I can get my Masters for free. The last thing I want to see when I go to class is some brat who thinks he's better than everyone else, wasting his parents money by sitting in class, not learning anything (or even trying) and getting the same grade as me. Suck it up. Pay attention for 2 hours. All your hos will like you more if you're smart AND have a BMW your Dad bought you. And I won't be forced to cut you in the dark alley behind the computer lab after class.